20 WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
From 2001-2004 I taught 8th grade. It was one of the best jobs that I had. I'm thinking about going back to school to become a teacher. One of the students that I kept in contact with sent me this funny email.*Thanks, Shay-Shay!*
1. AT LUNCH TIME, SIT IN YOUR PARKED CAR WITH SUNGLASSES ON AND POINT A HAIR DRYER AT PASSING CARS. SEE IF THEY SLOW DOWN.
2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.
3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.
4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN BOX"
5. PUT DECAF IN THE COFFEE MAKER FOR 3 WEEKS. ONCE EVERYONE HAS GOTTEN OVER THEIR CAFFEINE ADDICTIONS, SWITCH TO ESPRESSO.
6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS".
7. FINISH ALL YOUR SENTENCES WITH "IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY."
8. DON'T USE ANY PUNCTUATION!
9. AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE, SKIP RATHER THAN WALK.
10. ORDER DIET WATER WITH A SERIOUS FACE WHENEVER YOU GO OUT TO EAT.
11. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THROUGH ORDER IS "TO GO."
12. SING ALONG AT THE OPERA.
13. GO TO A POETRY RECITAL AND ASK WHY THE POEMS DON'T RHYME.
14. PUT MOSQUITO NETTING AROUND YOUR WORK AREA AND PLAY TROPICAL SOUNDS ALL DAY.
15. FIVE DAYS IN ADVANCE, TELL YOUR FRIENDS YOU CAN'T ATTEND THEIR PARTY BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT IN THE MOOD.
16. HAVE YOUR CO-WORKERS ADDRESS YOU BY YOUR WRESTLING NAME, ROCK BOTTOM.
17. WHEN THE MONEY COMES OUT THE ATM, SCREAM "I WON! I WON!"
18. WHEN LEAVING THE ZOO, START RUNNING TOWARDS THE PARKING LOT, YELLING "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THEY'RE LOOSE!!"
19. TELL YOUR CHILDREN OVER DINNER. "DUE TO THE ECONOMY, WE ARE GOING TO HAVE TO LET ONE OF YOU GO."
20. SHARE THIS MESSAGE WITH 5 FRIENDS .... IT'S CALLED THERAPY!
2 Comments:
funny -- I just got this myself the other day. I think these things run around the Internet and then BLAM hit all at once again!
Tooo Funny! I had to create a blog just to make a comment. I am at work laughing out loud; real loud at this 20 ways...list. I needed that pick me up today, I think I can run on and see what the end will be!!! And perhaps tomorrow at lunch put on my shades and pull out my hair dryer and clock some people! Thanks for the pick me up.
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